Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Red Faced

All week I have kept to my diet.  I fought the urge to weigh myself and I exercised daily.  I also prepared for a visit from dear friends of ours from our neighborhood in Texas.  They were to arrive on Saturday. 

Our friends have two boys who were buddies with mine and so we were all really excited.  There would be someone for everyone!  The youngest announced to his class that he was going to see real snow for the first time in his life.  We still had some snow on the ground but it was quickly melting with the unusually warm weather we were experiencing.  Drew and I prayed for snow.  Drew specifically prayed that the snow would melt so that our friends flight would not be delayed and that the next day it would snow up to our thighs so our friends could see snow fall.  Ha!

Saturday morning I got busy.  I needed to clean the house, start a stew in the crock pot and take Gabriel to a birthday party.  Aaron wanted to take the boys out to shop for supplies for their Pinewood Derby cars as the Cub Scouts were having a race in a week.  I thought this was a great idea!  It would allow me to clean undisturbed. 

"I think I'm going to buy them some paint," Aaron told me.

"Um...really?  Paint?  You know I have tons and tons of acrylic paints, right?"

He and the boys went to the hardware store and returned with 6 cans of spray paint.  OK... 

By now I have the upstairs clean and looking lovely.  I still needed to start the stew, clean the basement bathroom, make the guest bed, and vacuum the basement.  Oh and a shower would be excellent!  Before starting that I needed to take Gabe to his friends birthday party.  Aaron could take him but the birthday boys mom had just had a baby and I wanted to congratulate her personally and deliver a gift to her.  After I got home there were only 2 hours until our guests were to arrive.  Eek!

I surveyed the basement.  I noticed that Aaron left the spray paint he bought on the pub table.  He would need to put those away before the guests arrived.  I needed to get the stew started first and then I would tackle the mess downstairs.  I headed up to get things started.  Drew was playing in the basement.  Aaron was cleaning the garage.  I heard him coming in and out and at one time instructing Drew not to mess with the paints. 

I got all of the ingredients out for my stew but found that I was out of red pepper flakes.  I was just about to call Caren to see if she had any when I heard Drew making a hammering noise downstairs.  That can't be good...  I decided to invite him up to help me with dinner.

"No thanks.  I'm playing."

"What are you playing?"


Just as I thought that I should find out just what "nothing" is; I heard a Pssssssssssssssssssssssst sound coming from the basement followed by Drew screaming "OH NO!!!  Aaaaaaaaagh!"

I flew downstairs to see a geyser of red spray paint shooting off from my coffee table.  I grabbed the can and ran to the sliding glass door to chuck it out onto the deck.  The door was locked.  So while I fumbled with the door, paint sprayed in my face, getting in my eyes and splattered the glass door.  I finally got it open and tossed the can on to the deck.  As this is happening Aaron, having heard the commotion, comes charging in.  I have to say that I loved, loved, loved his response to seeing the mess that had been made by his son's disobedience of his direct order. 

"Buddy are you OK?!"  he said as he ran to Drew's side.  Then he noticed the can spraying on the deck.  Aaron ran out to toss the can into the yard (Duh.  Much better then repainting the deck) then he rushed back to Drew.

"Settle down buddy.  Did any get in your mouth?  Your eyes?" 

I was trying to blink out the paint that was in my eyes and assess my home.  Before that could be done though Drake came charging through the house.  Aaron had left the door open!  Drake always heads upstairs to hunt for the cats.  Aaron ran after him (You can imagine the shouting and cursing at Drake!) and I ushered Drew into the bathroom and started the tub.

"Take your clothes off Drew," I instructed over his wailing.  Inside I felt like the exploding paint can.  Anger spewed over his disobedience, worry for his safety, empathy for how bad the little guy was already feeling (not to mention that he was scared about the consequence) and stress because in less then two hours I would have a house full of guests.  I looked in the mirror and saw that I would be meeting these guests with a red splattered face.  I went into the living room to what appeared to be a scene from a slasher movie.  Red paint was puddled on the coffee table and splattered across the sliding glass door, dripping down, down to our new carpet.  Not to mention the Zorro sprayed on the front deck. 


Aaron tended to Drew while I tried to clean the sliding glass door.  I was going to need paint thinner.  I also needed red pepper flakes for my stew.  I commenced calling Caren.

"Do you have paint thinner and red pepper flakes we can borrow?"

It was Kevin who answered, "We do!  Come on over, I'll open a bottle of wine."

"I can't.  My diet."

"Aw..." he teased, "...too bad!"

I headed over thinking how much I would really enjoy that glass of wine right now.  When I got to the door I knocked and let myself in.  Our friends Dave and Melissa were there too.  Kevin, Caren, Dave and Melissa all looked at me with horror struck expressions.

"What is that?"  Caren asked.  (She late confessed to me that she thought I had a terrible rash and was thinking don't bring that rash in here!!!)

"It's paint."  I proceeded to relay my story to them.  It was hard to be heard however, over the gales of laughter. 

"Wait a minute,"  Kevin snorted, "let me get a picture of you.  I've got to send this to my mother!"

"Nice, Kev.  Nice." 

"Hey, aren't your friends here?"  Kevin asked.

"They will be here in less than two hours."

"Oh well this is an emergency!"  Kevin ran off to get the paint thinner.

While we waited for Kevin, Caren got her iPhone out for pictures as well. 
"This is the funniest thing ever!  I must say, you are handling this much better than I would be!"

My friends all laughed as I posed with the paint thinner and the GoJo that Kevin brought up for me.  I got the red pepper flakes and took my walk of shame home.  It was later reported to me that the four laughed all night about our little...accident, and took turns telling how they think they would've reacted.

When I got home I handed Aaron the GoJo to start scrubbing Drew's face with.  It has pumice in it so this was none to pleasant for him.  I could hear him in there apologizing profusely the whole time.  Before Aaron got to scrubbing though I got tickled with my friends response and thought a picture had to be taken.  Drew was not so ready to laugh about it but I told him he owed us this picture:

I left Aaron to the Drew-mess and I took the thinner and set to work on the sliding glass door and then the coffee table.  It messed up the coffee table a bit but it's an old beat up one as it is.  The carpet has splatter and drips on it but I left it unattended.  That would have to be tackled another time.
Amazingly, we got it all done.  The bathroom was clean, the bed made, the basement vacuumed and dinner prepared.  I also got my much needed shower though it was not the leisurely one I had hoped for.  Instead I was scrubbing my face with the pumice.  I have to tell you, that stuff made my skin so shiny and smooth!  I may have to add it to the beauty regime...

This is the best we got with Drew:

It took all weekend but the paint is finally gone from his face.  Mostly....
Everything was finished just as my friend text that she was turning onto our street.  WHEW!  We had a wonderful visit with them with a lot of laughs at Drew's and I's expense.  The Texas kids were much impressed with our patches of remaining snow.  The boys had so much fun sledding and building snowmen.  My friends youngest boy kept rolling in it and wrestling with it.  It was hilarious.  We never got the thigh deep snow fall though we did see some flurries.  God answered our prayer for fun in the snow and snow fall but did it His way.  Of course!

I stayed on my diet though I confess to having a piece of popcorn and a glass of wine.  I forgot all about the scale until this a.m.  I was getting another diet friendly breakfast together when it hit me It's TUESDAY! Biggest Loser tonight and Team Purple gets to weigh in!!!  As an unofficial member of Team Purple,  I was so excited that I could finally weigh myself!  I ran into the bathroom and stripped down.  I had a glance over at myself in the bathroom mirror.

I think I look trimmer....Yes!

I just knew I'd see great numbers!  I hopped on and...the dial moved down...one pound.  I couldn't believe it.  I immediately recalled my Aunt Marilyn saying "remember that muscle weighs more than fat."   I tried to give myself a pep talk all morning.  I text Caren who cheered for my loss.

After I got my friends off to the airport and Drew off to school (Gabriel had to stay home sick) I headed to Caren's for Baking Day.  I was going to make an Asian Chicken Salad. 

"You don't seem like your usual self..."  Caren assessed.

"Really?  I guess I'm sad my friends left and I'm really bummed that I only lost one pound."

"Here,"  Caren said as she placed four sticks of butter in my hand, "this is what you lost.  Now put that on your butt."

"I wish I could put it on my butt.  That's where I need it." 

I was so mad about the measly one pound that I went ahead and had a cookie today.  So...take that you stupid diet!  Now I'm back in the saddle but if I don't lose at least two pounds this week then I quit.

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