Several times this week I've had a feeling of deja vu. I'd go downstairs and the house smells like it did when we first moved in. In the kitchen making breakfast, it would feel like one of those first mornings in our new home. It hit me on my walk today that we are very near to our one year anniversary in Colorado. We closed on the house either July 31st or August 1st. I don't remember....
This time of the year the mornings/evenings are cool and light. The breeze carries the scent of wildflowers and pine. Outside birds and squirrels chirp at each other and one can hear the trilling hum of the hummingbirds as they buzz the house. Everything feels new to me again. New but comfortable. Like when you get to pull out those perfectly worn in flip flops for the first time for summer or the equally perfectly worn in jeans for the first time in the fall.
A year ago, everyday felt adventurous. Who would we meet? What would we see? Even a trip to the grocery was trimmed with excitement. There were new dangers too.
Remember that hummingbird that charged my face? We all laugh now but you know another friend of mine (a mountain woman, mind you) said she had something similar happen to her once and it was scary! They have really long, sharp looking beaks. Coming at your FACE! Well, I still love the hummingbird. From a safe distance.
Also the bugs. There does seem to be less bugs up here then it is in Texas. I don't think it's so much that there are less but that they do not swarm you as they do in Texas. When Lesley was here last week we did have a weird sort of bee-fly that followed us down the hill. It was so annoying! We ran flapping our arms everywhere and the little bugger kept after us. Finally it seemed to be gone until I saw it piggy backing on Lesley's back. I took the shirt she had tied around her waist and swatted at the thing until it fell dead. (Sorry Les.) Lesley examined it. We'd never seen a bug like it before. The next morning the same thing happened again! Same bug. Well, not exactly the same bug because we killed it but...same kind of bee-fly thing. My friends always tell me it's silly to be afraid of bugs. "They won't bother you if you don't bother them." BULL! This little turd stalked us!
We have chalk boards through out our neighborhood where people post information like petting sitting, kickball games, things for sale or bear sightings. "6/24 9 p.m. young cat mountain lion spotted at this intersection," one of the chalk boards reads. That always gives me a warm fuzzy feeling...
I remember my first hike at Red Rocks. I got freaked out by a field mouse that ran across the trail I was on. Well guess what I woke up to Monday morning? A dead field mouse in my house! Hurray cats. I guess. I know it's a gift but I have not been able to muster up any thankfulness. Husband was not home, neighbors were gone and so I had to deal with the remains myself. I got two dustpans. One for scooping up the little guy and one for keeping a sort of lid over him. You never know. He could be faking it and jump up onto my face or something. Don't tell me it could never happen because ya'll also told me bugs were not coming after me and hummingbirds are not scary. Wrong on both counts. I flung the little rat over the fence. Some fox probably enjoyed it.
So I have survived a year on the mountain. I can handle critters, feed the hummingbirds, hike amongst mountain lions and bears, build fires, make food from scratch, snow shoe, ski...sort of, and can drive in the snow and ice. I've made wonderful, fabulous friends but I still terribly miss my Texas people. Today especially.
"Miss you," I texted to Shalah and Lauren. Even though I just saw them a few weeks ago, my heart aches for everyone back home.
"Miss you too," they said.
"My last visit left me very unsatisfied."
"Ditto," said Lauren, "Like having only one spoonful of your favorite dessert."
Even the homesickness is a deja vu.